No Screening Tests Done....

Yesterday was my screening tests but i decided to cancel my appointment. I called and scheduled for November. The tests have to be less than 3 months old and if we are going in Feb. they need to be done in November. (That or i was getting cold feet!) Nah, I just feel so much pressure this go round because if it doesnt work we have no $$ to try a 3rd time right away. And i am an anxious person, i have NO, NONE, ZERO, patience. So thats my dilemma. I dont want to get excited because i did last time and i must have jinxed myself. Who the hell knows. I just want a baby, says the infertile woman to other infertile women...

My hubby is the absolute BEST. My Birthday is Saturday and he has been working so hard in planning a surprise B-day get away but i messed it up when my family and in-laws were planning a get together at the house. OOOPS!! So when i broke my news so did he yesterday. So we are just gonna invite everyone on our get away trip to the Casino and stay in their gorgeous hotel upstairs. Lets see what everyone says today but its ok, it will all work out. He says he hates to plan surprises for me because i'm so anxious!! i go ahead and plan stuff without him, (hint: maybe guys should plan surprises way in advance not a couple of days before a girls b-day, saying he didnt have enough time to plan because i was always home when hes home....poor thing looked to stressed yesterday.)

I have not sent in our application or fee. That will be done after my birthday weekend.

PS. I want to go back to my other job and go back full-time. My new job is great but the allergens are triggering my sinus and leading to migraines. I hope my other job can take me back full-time. Lets hope and pray, we all know we need the $$ right now. We cant afford to miss any time off from work. Therefore if i go back to my full-time job now then in Jan. i will be unemployed, because the grant will be over with the state. So i take my chances there, hoping something else will come up.

My hubby usually doesnt talk about the surrogacy trip other than we need to get out documents together...but he said the cutest thing yesterday when i told him if i go back to my old job, i might not be working in Jan. (because of the reasons stated above) and he says...get this...thats ok because in 9 months you will have to be home with the baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Doesnt that just blow u away....i did for me...now i know he thinks about it but doesnt talk about it...guys are such guys...LOL....